missionary position

All posts in the missionary position category

First you allow gay marriage…

Published September 9, 2012 by republicanfaithchat

Who knows where the slippery slope leads to!

Ok, that is just a cartoon. But just look at what is happening in nature!

It is bad enough we see a toad trying to mate (get into amplexus) with a frog, but it turns out that both amphibians are MALE!!!!

See????

So there libs…see what gay marriage has lead to???

Sinful Saturday: Porn Stars with Twitter Accounts!

Published January 28, 2012 by republicanfaithchat

We all know that the Satanic ACLU just loves to protect the pornography industry. That is an outrage in and of itself.

But did you know that some porn stars have internet accounts and can be followed on things like twitter?

(Stay away from the twitter account of the Scarlet Woman Phoenix Marie, which is here! Don’t surf here!)

This cannot stand. We urge Promise Keeper groups around the nation to monitor the internet for such things!

Republican Faith Chat: Sinful Saturday

Published December 3, 2011 by republicanfaithchat

I haven’t decided on what to do with Republican Faith Chat; things just aren’t the same without Tiffany Wellsley and Prophetess Debbie.

But one thing is certain: we will take a stand for Christian morality.
In this spirit, I am considering doing a regular feature: Sinful Saturday. The idea will be for me (or us) to direct devote Christian Republican men to clean up the internet by ridding it of all sorts of Unchristian influences.

The first step is to do some deep prayer to get into the mood. The next step is to do the internet research. The next step is to make other Godly Republican Christians to join in the search.

So, for our first installment, we will focus on a Satanic influence on youtube: the absolutely sinful, Unchristian series called “Watch Me Shrink”.

Here is how it works: some tarts decided to announce that they want to lose weight (a good thing, in some instances). But then they take off all of their clothes (except for their underwear) and then they brazenly pose in their Satanic seductive attire.

Here are some vile examples: (click on the thumbnail to see the vile, Satanic, Unchristian video)

America: End Your Love Affair with Satanic Yoga!

Published November 30, 2011 by republicanfaithchat

Ok, I am well aware that Catholics are hell bound Papists lead by costumed pedophiles. But the Papists don’t get everything wrong.

Yes, he looks ridiculous with his cross with Idol and his Halloween costume; he is an exorcist (snicker).

But when it comes to the Satanic practice of yoga, he is right on:

Yoga is the work of the devil, according to a man who claims to have banished evil spirits from 70,000 people. Gabriele Amorth, the Vatican’s chief exorcist, says yoga leads to a belief in Hinduism, and “all eastern religions are based on a false belief in reincarnation,” the Telegraph quotes him as saying. The elderly priest, speaking at a film festival in Italy this week, said practicing yoga leads to evil “just like the Harry Potter books,” which he believes promote black magic.

“In Harry Potter the devil acts in a crafty and covert manner, under the guise of extraordinary powers, magic spells, and curses,” said Amorth, who was at the film festival to introduce a new American exorcism movie, The Rite, which stars Anthony Hopkins as a Jesuit priest.

Really, how can America not see this?

Just look at how yoga is practiced!

Even older women can’t resist the temptation to attempt to be temptresses!

There is really no excuse for this.

So, Prayer Warriors: I beseech you to take a stand! It won’t be easy; when I attempted to gather evidence at a local Park District yoga class by showing up and taking photos, Barack HUSSEIN Obama’s socialist police threw me out and gave me a restraining order.

And yes, the wife might not understand; my internet yoga photo research project was erased from my computer’s hard drive. Note to self: thumb drive…hide it from the wife…

But together, we can do this!